Welcome To My Life
by passiveInferno
Summary: Another songfic. This time, it's Tobias being depressed. Warnings: Mild swearing and Emo!Tobias. Does not own. Rating between K and mild T. Oneshot.


SONGFIC -- by SweetPinkDragon aka. SPD aka. Elise -yadda, yadda, you know who I am.

The Allmighty Banana has a disclaimer to give, so let him do it.

The Allmighty Banana: SHE OWNS NUTHIN. NOT EVEN THE SONG. BANANA ALLMIGHTY HATH SPOKEN.

You heard him.

* * *

Hi. I'm Tobias. Or bird-boy - you might already know me by both names. Right now, I'm.. not doing anything that'd interest you, I guess. I'm a red-tailed hawk, I've had my breakfast, what can I do when I'm restless? That's right. I fly. I ride the thermals as usual. The same thermals as I ride every fucking day. Usually, though, I enjoy it. Right now, all I can do is being angry. Angry with myself. Angry with world.

____

Do you ever feel like breaking down?  
Do you ever feel out of place?  
Like somehow you just don't belong  
And no one understands you

I have never been the kind of guy you'd see having friends. Unless bullies count as 'friends'. They usually don't. Sometimes, I wish I could just be normal. You know, the kind of guy who has friends to hang with, the kind of guy who doesn't spend his spare time with his head down the toilet or riding thermals or eating roadkill for breakfast.

_Do you ever wanna run away?  
Do you lock yourself in your room?  
With the radio on turned up so loud  
That no one hears you screaming_

I'd give SO much for a normal life. A life with a family and friends. And Rachel, of course. I wouldn't want to be without her. In fact.. I don't think I could be without her. She's almost all I have. She's all I've got, and I won't ever give her up. If she died.. I don't think I could go on.

_No, you don't know what it's like  
When nothing feels all right  
You don't know what it's like  
To be like me_

Nobody, and I mean nobody, would understand me, no matter how much I told them about myself. Nobody can understand how this is. I can only imagine how it'd be if someone tried making me go to a therapist.

Hi, I'm Tobias. Yeah, I'm that talking bird over there. Yes, I talk. You see, I used to be human, but some aliens invaded Earth, and a blue big horsie-alien with a scorpion tail and human body from torso and up, just with fur, gave me the ability to be any kind of animal I can touch. What? Whether or not I've eaten any strange pills lately, Doctor? No, I don't think so, pretty much only roadkill, mice ant rats, maybe a rabbit or two. Why do you ask? Oh, you're moving me to another room? One with rubber walls? Splendid.

Yeah, that'd turn out lovely.

_To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you_

There's no such thing as a bully free world. Sure, I got away from the bullies at school by ending up being a red-tailed hawk for the rest of my life. Awesome. Now all I have to deal with is all the animals and birds that try stealing my food or territory. Or both. If the hawk life hadn't teached be to be tough, and I'd have been human, I would probably be crying like a wimp.

_No you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life_

Welcome to my life. That's a line I use a lot when I see people who suffer because of what they are. Where they are. Who they are. For being born. I wish I could help them, but I can't. Nobody helped me either. Except for Jake, that is. And Rachel. Come to think about it, all the Animorphs seem to care for me. I just wish I could be normal..

_Do you wanna be somebody else?  
Are you sick of feeling so left out?  
Are you desperate to find something more?  
Before your life is over_

If I just could have been someone other than me.. Anyone.. I'm just Tobias, the bully victim, the hawk, the bird-boy. Mother Nature's unwanted creature. All I can do right now, is being hawk. I circle around the school my friends go to a few times. I can see everyone. I see Jake, who's fiddling with some paper. I can read what he's writing if I want to, but decide to let him have a few secrets. I'll eventually find out anyway, I can't not see what he does, you know. Then, I can see Cassie. She's busy taking notes from the blackboard, and doing her homework. Not surprising, actually. It's not like any of them have time for homework between sleeping, fighting Yeerks and school. Rachel is looking out of the window, and notices me, as if she's been waiting to see if I'd fly by. She smiles, and winks to me. I'd smile back if I'd been human.. Then, I can see Marco. He seems lost in thought. I wonder what he's thinking. He glances out of the window, and looks at me for a moment. A second or two, I saw him frowning. Now I really wonder what he's thinking.

_Are you stuck inside a world you hate?  
Are you sick of everyone around?  
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies  
While deep inside you're bleeding_

Hadn't it been for my friends, I'd probably have been voluntary roadkill long ago.. They all pretend to understand, but they don't know a shit about how it is. The only one who could possibly understand it to a degree, would be David - and he was the biggest jerk I've ever been so unfortunate to meet. He threatened Rachel. I would have made him roadkill too if I could. Nobody gets away with doing anything to my Rachel.

_No you don't know what it's like  
When nothing feels all right  
You don't know what it's like  
To be like me_

I just wish for someone to understand me.. Is that too much to ask?

Apparently.

_To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life_

A couple of bullies are underneath me, threatening a kid. I levae them an unforeseen "surprise" from above, just because I can. There you go, world, my contribution to peace until we win against the Yeerks.

_No one ever lied straight to your face  
And no one ever stabbed you in the back  
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay_

A hawk can't feel happiness. The closest thing to happiness would be satisfaction after catching live meal and eating it raw.

_Everybody always gave you what you wanted  
You never had to work it was always there  
You don't know what it's like, what it's like_

If there's something that annoys me almost more than bullies, it's people who get everything they want. Snobby people who could just demand to have anything and get it. Those people sicken me so much. Let's see them trying to catch their own food without their snobby weapons.

_To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)_

There's no such thing as "fair". If things had been fair, I wouldn't have been here. I would be with Rachel, and I'd be happy.

_To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life  
Welcome to my life  
Welcome to my life_

I circle around the school once more, look at Rachel one more time, and fly back into the woods.

**A/N:** You totally saw something like that coming soon, eh. The song is Welcome To My Life by Simple Plan. And yeah, I already know that this Tobias ended up a lot more emo than I expected.. Leave a review or request or something? Pretty please?


End file.
